How to cope with overwhelm

Sooner or later we are likely to be overwhelmed with that feeling that life is dealing us more than we can currently process or handle.  Like my little poodle in the photo, the path before us may seem daunting and we're leashed at the bottom of a steep upward climb.  Overwhelm might also be described as fear, fear of what lies ahead, fear that we are not capable, fear of loss or pain, fear of failure, or fear of disappointing others.

I have a quote pinned up in my office, ""Fear Not" is the response to fear, not a shaming of it.  It's an invitation to courage."
I've taken a lot of comfort in those words over the past 12 months, I find the concept very soothing - my circumstances might have me feeling helpless and overwhelmed but the idea that I can use my situation to help me develop into a more courageous woman, well, that puts a different spin on things. It becomes an opportunity to practice being stronger and more courageous (practice being the key word).

"... Be strong and courageous.  Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.
Joshua 1:9

I am not by nature courageous or strong, in the past I have suffered from debilitating anxiety.  I have come to realize though that no amount of fretting on my part has ever changed ANYTHING.  What I have found that works is soothing my racing mind and prayer.

To sooth my overactive mind, I will do one or more of the following: write out my thoughts in a journal, call my sister (my voice of reason and logic), listen to soothing music, do a bit of yoga, take a walk, cuddle my dog, have a good long cry (to relieve tension), do something nice for someone else, drink tea and get enough sleep.  I also recall  the times in the past that God has carried me through trials in amazing ways, I thank Him and ask for His guidance and help yet again.

I hope you are not feeling discouraged or overwhelmed today but if you are take heart, you are not alone, reach out to those whom you trust and love and know you are stronger and more courageous than you might feel or believe.

Thank you for stopping by My Turquoise Kettle Life,

Wishing you peace of mind,

Sandra

Under the Influence

Hollyhocks - (Sandra)

Recently my five year old granddaughter has been painting with me in the studio.  We've talked about landscapes, portraits and still life. She is a free-spirit and has her own ideas about most things including creativity and painting so it was interesting when we tackled a still life and her work was very reminiscent of my own style.  Not surprising; we imitate and learn.  We are influenced.

Pink flowers in a blue bowl  (SJ)

I wondered if "influe" originated with the idea of in-flow and yes that is the origin of the word ( late Middle English: from Old French or Latin, "inflow".  Originally suggesting "influx, flowing matter".) If you adhere to the belief that all life is vibrating energy flowing and moving, you can picture how influence may work, other people's ideas, beliefs, behaviours and energy flow to us and through us.

So when Jim Rohn famously said that "You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.", I can see how that may be true or at least how the general idea of that may be true.  We are sponges soaking in our environment, what we see, what we hear, what we consume (both physically and emotionally).  With awareness we can always choose to reject and release any negativity that we have encountered, but how much simpler and healthier to deliberately choose, when we can, to surround ourselves with what we do want to absorb, what we do want in-flowing and influencing us.

Since I'm highly sensitive, I'm particular about what I eat, read, watch and how I care for myself.  I try to surround myself with beauty and to choose people who are uplifting and positive.  Does it mean that we don't reach out to those who are depressed, ill, hurting?  Not at all, we are meant to give and receive help, comfort and connection; it is important though to strike a balance and perhaps to off-set a particularly negative, draining encounter with a rejuvenating one.  Sometimes however, a long on-going, no-end-in-sight situation calls for extremely difficult decisions; ending the relationship, changing jobs, moving and moving-on.

We are all "under the influence" of our environments and relationships.  What or whom is influencing you? What could be tweaked to fine tune your already wonderful, happy life?  Or conversely, if life isn't flowing as you would like it to, is it time to make those difficult choices and  "flush" a negative influence down the proverbial drain?  

Thank you for visiting My Turquoise Kettle Life today.

Wishing you a most positive day,

Sandra

Of Sparrows and Synchronicity

I just love the synchronicity of life, the unseen web that weaves us all together.  It leaves me in awe when my very thoughts and inward questions are answered in surprising and amazing ways.

For the past two blustery and freezing days I've refilled the bird feeder that hangs on my front balcony several times.  I've watched with amusement, from the warmth of my kitchen, as dozens of sparrows flit back and forth from shrub to feeder over and over again.  Food for birds is scare in January in Canada.

I was moved by their community dining, the way they braved the plunging temperatures and fierce winds, huddling together, taking turns at the feeder and hopping on the snow covered balcony floor looking for seeds that had fallen.

Yesterday I tried taking some photos of the sparrows (an exercise in futility) and then of the patterns their feet had made in the snow (equally unsuccessful).  I had really wanted to write a post about them, but wasn't sure what.  All I knew was that I had spent a lot of time watching them, appreciating them.

Earlier today I received an e-mail from a real estate agent I'd connected with over a year ago from Prince Edward County, Ontario.  We chatted back and forth a bit, I updated her on why I was no longer looking to relocate at this time (divorced, doing work I love now...) and I mentioned my blog which would give her an idea of what had been going on.  She wrote back saying that the last blog entry reminded her of a hymn "His Eye is on the Sparrow".  "That's weird", I thought, "sparrow?".  I wasn't familiar with the hymn so I listened to it on my phone as I watched the sparrows from the window; tears welled up as the words assured of how we are known, protected and provided for.  If you're not familiar with the reference, there is a line in the Bible that goes something like this, Look at the birds of the air; they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet God feeds them...Fear not therefore you are of more value than many sparrows.

We can all relate to the "winter seasons" of our lives, when the winds blow and we fear that what we need may be scarce.  How reassuring it is to be reminded that we are all connected and that what we require will be provided, sometimes in the most unusual and surprising ways!

Photo courtesy of Garden Safari

Thank you for stopping in at My Turquoise Kettle Life today.

May you experience the joy of synchronicity,
Sandra

Selfishness and Freedom

"Selfishness is not living as one wishes, but asking others to live as one wishes."  Oscar Wilde

Title: Soft Flowers. 30"x 30" Acrylic Mixed Media
S. King-Allikas

I LOVE this quote!  It feels like a permission slip to leave the confines of a dull class, or a "get out of jail free" card in Monopoly.  It just begs to be sent to all those people in our lives who want us to show up where they want us to be and to behave as they would like us to; those individuals who manipulate and pressure us to make choices and live lives that don't threaten the safety of their world and their choices.

Sometimes I am at fault for not speaking up and expressing my wants or needs, so how could anyone know? The challenge is how to deal with situations when you've mustered up the courage to make the unpopular choice, to say that a situation is no longer acceptable, that you will not be able to fit yourself into their schedule, and that I am choosing something other than what they hoped I would choose.

This is where my thinking was going circular until I found a quote on freedom which has proven oh so helpful.
"The moment I accept the consequences of my choices, I am free to choose whatever I want."

So then it becomes a simple formula, I am feeling pressure to choose "A" but I want to choose "B".  The possible consequences of choosing "B" are ________ (fill in the blank) for example: "They will be angry and may not speak to me". "I may be passed over for a promotion."  "She will gossip and try to turn others against me." "He will say that I am selfish." Am I willing to accept these consequences?   If yes I have the freedom to choose what is right for me, every time.

We must each choose how to live our best life, that is our unselfish gift to the world.

Thank you for stopping in at My Turquoise Kettle Life today.

Wishing you a day of freedom,

Sandra

A Minimalist's Kitchen Reno... I see the light

From The Renovation Rule Book
Rule 7: It's not true that the builder will never turn up. In fact, he'll turn up on day one, at precisely the time promised, whereupon he will disconnect your plumbing, remove a section of your roof, then disappear for six months.


After three weeks of plywood windows in our kitchen (a dark and cold kitchen) , our new window has been installed.

Window Installation
The plywood is removed

 

After installing an additional header and preparing the opening
the window is lifted into place

 

The kitchen window was assembled as one solid 13' window

 

 

Exterior of kitchen window

 



I am delighted with the airy feeling the new window has created, it’s as beautiful as I imagined it would be. Well worth the cost and the wait.

 

Check back in a few weeks as we try to keep our kitchen renovation design simple and costs to a minimum. In an attempt not to get swept away with grandiose ideas, my self-reminder and kitchen mantra is, "Less is more, less is more, less is more...."

Thank you for visiting my Turquoise Kettle Life today.

Wishing you an enlightened day,

Sandra

A Minimalist's Kitchen Reno

From the Renovation Rule Book:

"Rule 4: The marital argument over whether to choose the ''Calypso Blue'' or the ''Ocean Breeze'' for the kitchen cupboards will rise in intensity according to the degree to which the two colours are indistinguishable."

Join me over the next little (hopefully) while as my husband and I give our kitchen a bit of an update while trying to keep costs to a minimum.

Neither of us had any intention of updating the kitchen, however our two kitchen windows were becoming increasingly problematic. We had the original 1963 "panorama" windows. This is a type of window that was surely designed for the tropics and not for Canadian homes. The window glass doesn't have any type of trim or frame; huge sheets of glass sit in tracks in a cedar frame and slide back and forth.

About a dozen years ago, we hired specialists to analyze our home's energy efficiency. Upon noticing our windows, the first guy called to his co-worker, "Hey, take a look at these windows, you've never seen anything like this before." After a few minutes of chuckling they suggested that unless we were prepared to replace the windows, we could put plastic over them in the winter to minimize our heat loss. And that is exactly what we've done ever since.

This fall we decided it was time to finally replace the two windows. As we pictured the windows we wanted, we decided to let our imagination roam and chose to remove the small piece of wall that separated the two windows and have one long series of windows spanning the full 13 feet.

Old windows and dividing wall removed

About three weeks ago the window installation crew arrived. They removed the two windows and frames. As they began to demolish the wall between the windows they found a three inch metal pipe running the full height of the wall. It was the air vent for the plumbing. There was nothing more they could do that day until we had the pipe removed and re-routed. The installers bought two sheets of plywood and nailed them over the huge gaping hole in our kitchen wall.

The unexpected air vent pipe

 

Interim window treatment is dark and drafty.

 

Two days later the pipe was dealt with and we were ready to go. Now the problem was getting the window people to return my calls and set another installation date. It's been nearly three weeks since the first installation attempt and of course three weeks of living in a very dark, not to mention drafty and cold kitchen. I didn't think there was a less efficient window treatment than our panorama windows, but apparently plywood is even less effective. We're hoping to see the installers here by the end of this week. I'll keep you posted.



Thanks for visiting My Turquoise Kettle Life today.

Wishing you a fun day,

Sandra

Painting a Series - Challenges & Victories

"A work of art is the unique result of a unique temperament."
Oscar Wilde

A couple of months ago my painting seemed to veer off in a new direction. I found myself painting with a new softer edge and a gentler palette of colours. Quite unexpectedly circles or spheres began to emerge, crying out, as it were, to be included. This work seemed to emanate from my core and often times I found that I felt emotionally overwhelmed during the creative process.



Acrylic & Mixed-Media Painting 30" x 30"
Sandra King-Allikas 

Paintings began to accumulate. I thought that this would make an interesting series of work. Pressing on I wanted to understand and explore this new direction. Trying not to over-think the process so as to keep the ideas fresh, I determined to allow the work to evolve without placing limitations on the outcome.

However, having already formed the thought of creating a particular series of work that would have a certain cohesive quality, I had in fact already placed a boundary or requirement on the painting process.

This week my strong-willed inner artist rebelled and out poured two rather more intense paintings, as if to challenge me, "Who do you think you are dealing with here? I won't be limited by your desire to create a series or anything else."

Acrylic & Mixed-Media Painting 28"x22"
Sandra King-Allikas

Acrylic & Mixed-Media Painting 20"x20"
Sandra King-Allikas

 

Well, there you go; artists do have a reputation for being unconventional, independent and sometimes ornery. I guess my inner artist is no different.

While the challenge to create a series or unified thematic body of work may be thwarted, the good news is that my inner creativity is alive and kicking.

Thanks for visiting My Turquoise Kettle Life today.

Wishing each of you an amazing day,

Sandra

Toronto

"As a remedy to life in society I would suggest the big city. Nowadays, it is the only desert within our means."
Albert Camus


Last week I travelled by train from Montreal to Toronto to visit my eldest daughter who has recently relocated there.   I had never been to Toronto; yet living in Montreal one tends to hear a lot of commentary on that city and little of it is positive.  My own experience proved otherwise, what I saw I found beautiful, especially the kilometers of waterfront.  But what captured my heart was the friendliness of the people.  People on downtown streets, in stores, strangers in the elevator were so often friendly, upbeat and helpful. 

We didn't do a lot of sight-seeing.  Mostly we hung out at her condo, putting the finishing touches on her new place, hanging paintings, organizing storage etc.  We also cooked, baked together, watched a couple of movies and often sat on her vast 25th floor balcony watching the city below.

If you've been reading my blog for any length of time you know how I crave solitude, quiet and times of retreat.  I would never have guessed that high above the center of one of North America's busiest cities I would have found that mystical space where quiet, solitude and security meet.

Toronto at night
Sandra King-Allikas

Early Morning Rain view of Toronto
Sandra King-Allikas

As evening encroached we would wrap ourselves in quilts and watch as the lights began to illuminate the night city.  The view was vast and uninterrupted for miles and miles.  I loved the comfort of her very private balcony combined with the sense of being elevated and removed from the noise, the problems and the reality of everyday life.  It was not unlike the sensation when I sit at the edge of a seemingly endless body of water, or that of being perched high above a landscape that dips and rises until it finally meets the horizon.  It was perfect, an oasis in the city.

 Isn't it interesting how we can find exactly what we're looking for in the most unlikely of places?

Thank you for stopping in at My Turquoise Kettle Life today.

Wishing you a magnificent day,

Sandra

Solutions May Be Within Walking Distance

"Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time."
Steven Wright

Yesterday I wrote a few words on the benefits of walking and how it can serve as a way to work out the creative kinks that temporarily befuddle the artist.   Taking a bit of my own advice, I washed up the brushes, took one last glance at the work on the easel and headed out the door, camera in hand. 

Standing under neighbourhood trees of various autumn colours yielded an array of vibrant images:



Autumn leaves
Sandra King-Allikas

 

Autumn Leaves
Sandra King-Allikas

 

Autumn Leaves
Sandra King-Allikas

 

Autumn Leaves
Sandra King-Allikas

 

Autumn Leaves
Sandra King-Allikas

Challenges and dilemmas always seem more manageable when I allow my mind and my feet to wander.

Thank you for visiting My Turquoise Kettle Life today.

Wishing you a vibrant day,

Sandra

Walking the path to Creativity

"I've discovered that success is all about running your own race, feeling comfortable in our own skin and living your life on your own terms. You do not want to get to your deathbed and realize you were not the real you (and that you ended up living someone else's dreams). That'll break your heart."
Author  - Robin Sharma

The past couple of weeks I've been holed up in my studio working on a new series of paintings that has me alternately delighted and stymied.  Just when I feel that I have this "painting thing" figured out I discover that my subsequent effort fails miserably.  Unlike math, formulas in painting are always short lived.  They tend to lead to predictability and (yawn...) boredom, both on the part of the artist and the viewer.

Paintings and artists often benefit from a little "shake-up" now and again.  I like to leave the studio for a while, go for a walk, rake the leaves and observe the sounds and colours of nature.  Autumn is a feast for the senses, vibrant colours, crunchy leaves underfoot, crisp winds, the smell of wood stoves, wooly sweaters.

Autumn Berries
Sandra King-Allikas

My week has been full of autumn walks; alone my walks tend to be brisk, with my dog they involve a lot of starts and stops for sniffing, and with my two year old grand-daughter, Sadie, our walks are meandering and full of discovery; "What's dat?" - "Leaves", "What's dat?" - "Airplane", "What's dat?" - "Squirrel". With such little legs and such big curiosity, we don't cover much distance but my walks with Sadie are some of my favourite.

After even a brief change of pace, I see new possibilities and solutions when I return to the easel. Time away from the "problem" allows me the distance and perspective I need to see the situation with fresh eyes, something that is beneficial both in and out of the art studio.

Thank you for stopping visiting My Turquoise Kettle Life today.

Wishing you a day full of creativity,

Sandra